


Soulmate

by ariapassionflower01



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: Brotherhood, Brotherly Love, Fluff, Other, Twins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-02
Updated: 2014-04-02
Packaged: 2018-01-17 21:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1403257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariapassionflower01/pseuds/ariapassionflower01
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill and Tom have always been together, and they always will be</p>
            </blockquote>





	Soulmate

**Author's Note:**

  * For [princesskay](https://archiveofourown.org/users/princesskay/gifts).



> I was feeling fluffy, oh so fluffy. I've watched Bill try to describe being a twin, and being a twin myself, I have to say, its really, really hard. There's just no way to explain it to all you singles out there. For those of us who are twins, let us bask in the awesomeness that is us!... What? Of course, I gloat;)

Soulmate. That's the word that describes my twin.

We've been together forever, from the very first moment that conception began inside our mother's body until now. And we'll probably stay like that for the rest of our lives. I think I could be happy dying right now if I could know for a certainty that Tom was lying next to me, holding my hand and breathing his last right there with me.

There's nothing quite like having a twin. It's like a part of your split off when you were born and that part of you now walks beside you all the time. Its like a shadow that you can't quite escape, that will not become unattached no matter what happens. We're constantly linked. Our brains run on the same wavelength, and if you listened to our heartbeats, I'm sure that they would be in sync too.

I notice everything about Tom. I've spent my life studying him and knowing him. The second he walks into a room, I can tell if he's happy, sad, angry, or whatever emotion might have a hold of him at the moment. I can tell if he's drunk, if he's just been laid, and exactly how he feels about it too. I can sense the slightest change in his behavior, the tiniest hint that something has upset him. When everyone else would walk on past, I would stop immediately to make sure he's okay. I just have to touch his arm, meet his eyes and I know whether he needs a few minutes of space or a good, long hug. We hardly need to talk anymore because I already know what he's thinking before he even opens his mouth. When we look at each other, his eyes are like a book to me, clear and defined, no matter what is hazing his brain at the instant.

Even in childhood, we operated like this. I remember in school, the teachers would put us in seats all the way across the room as if to separate us. That didn't stop me and Tom. All we had to do was glance over at each other. We could tell each other jokes, bitch about the teacher, gloat about the hot girl in front of us – all from twenty feet across the room, without ever saying a word. Sitting in each other's seat and tricking the teachers, along with all the students, was highly amusing and we might still play that game if not for the fact that our styles have grown so dissimilar.

It was a bit of shock for everyone when we started dressing ourselves differently. Before, we always went around with shirts stating “Bill” or “Tom” on the back for other to differentiate. It was apart of being a twin that everyone else seemed to take for granted, our dressing and looking alike. Tom and I, however, always like to defy standards and rules. I can't explain how our styles emerged, although I have to say it mostly had to do with the music we liked to listen to. Despite the fact, however, that we seemed to be growing apart, we had never been closer. It was during this time that we really began to pursue music as a career. Although we were still young and didn't seem to have although the “smarts” that seemed to be required, we were of like mind, and by God, we were _determined_. And when we both get something in our brains, no one else's opinion will be heard or have significance. My singing seemed to blend with Tom's guitar playing like it was meant to be.

That is not to say, however, that we always agreed on everything. We take things to extreme, Tom and I, and our fights are no different. We don't lie when we say that tables and chairs get destroyed. I once bashed Tom's face on a glass table and gave a little scar on his cheek. Its quite laughable, but I can't really remember what our fights are about. Mostly stupid things that we get over in the next second. I'll still have blood on my nose while I hug Tom and we make up. Then he tugs me to the bathroom and washes it off, cleaning away the marks that he made with his own hand. Tom and I are like that though. If anyone else, however, tried to do the same to us, Tom and I would never forgive them. Tom is protective of me and I likewise. He likes to claim the older brother status and sometimes I complain, but I've never argued against him standing up for me, getting riled when someone insults me. We used to read magazines articles and TV broadcasts about ourselves when the band was first formed, although that was quite a mistake. The first time the gay rumor came up, we all laughed it off, because it was laughable... right? After the third or fourth time with increasingly hateful language, Tom became angry. “They _can't_ say those things about you, Bill!” He railed to me, all red in the face. “They _can't._ You're my brother and they can't!” I brushed it off once more, but in my heart, I was more than happy to have him, my rock and my defender, as my side at all time. Even if no one else was there to hear his violent protest, _I_ was there and that was all that mattered. 

Tom is just the brother that everyone wishes they could have. But Tom is mine, my soulmate. Sometimes, I think we'll never be married because we just cling too tightly to each other. I admit, it would be terribly hard to let him go to another person, man or woman. I would be afraid that they would break his heart and hurt him. In my hands, he's safe, and I in his. I know he'll never let me down or hurt me. 

Sometimes, I fear that stage of growing up, no matter how much I proclaim my search for the perfect girl. I know that time may come someday; Tom and I are not getting any younger. But sometimes I wish for those innocent times, when it was just Tom and me in our little home, huddled together in Tom's bed, whispering secrets and dreams. Sometimes, I wish we could walk down the road together arm and arm just to go to the icecream stand. Sometimes, I wish for the time when I could hold his hand and kiss his cheek without the wondering eyes. Sometimes.. But other times, I look at our world, the world that we have created, and I never want to imagine another scenario. 

Without Tom, I couldn't have done this. I couldn't be anything without him. I wouldn't have the strength or the courage to stand up in front of thousands of people without knowing he's at my shoulder. I couldn't let them hear the first faltering notes of the song unless he was standing with me, playing every note. I couldn't let them see this face without him, because I couldn't not claim all its beauty and wonder without him. His face is my face, his heart my heart. 

I can't explain all that Tom is in a few short words. Perhaps, I could speak for hours or days. There is a lifetime that lies between us. But I know one thing for certain. Tom is my only twin, the unwavering, constant moon to my wild, exploding sun. He is my guiding rock, my light, my savior when I need to be saved. He is my everything. My soulmate. 


End file.
